I didn't desire to believe that Fallout 4, the sequel to i of my favorite games of all time, wasn't actually doing it for me. Then, like whatsoever rational person, I made myself miserable trying to convince myself that I was having A Actually Great Time.

I think it's happened to u.s.a. all at some point or another: a game you've idolized from afar finally comes out, and you're set to make sloppy, unfettered dear to information technology with your eyes and hands and hopefully but those things. You boot information technology upwards and caryatid yourself for magic.

Hours laissez passer. Magic notwithstanding hasn't happened. This is... unexpected. That is when you begin your Dante-esque multi-phase descent into a very unique sort of madness: thwarting.

Stage 1: The Sinking Feeling

You are playing what should be the game of the century. Yous watched, you waited. In spite of yourself and your best efforts, yous bought into the egregiously over-manufactured hype. (Yous DIDN'T PREORDER, THOUGH.)

But it'due south only not clicking. This phase can best be summed up as, "Something's wrong" or perchance, "I feel a disturbance in The Force." The second one is particularly apt if you lot were disappointed by the new Star Wars movie.

Stage Two: Information technology's Not Y'all, It's Me

This stage is pretty similar to bargaining, one of the five stages of grief—y'all know, that matter people experience when somebody dies.

When I first realized that Fallout 4 didn't have its hooks in my very essence, I figured that, you know, possibly I was just doing something wrong. Surely I'd managed to bungle my way right past all the interesting stuff and into the game'south (insufficiently small, I hoped) handful of generic, predictable locations. Of course that's what happened. Archetype Nathan, am I right? What a buffoon.

Know what else? I probably congenital my grapheme poorly. I mean, obviously. A focus on strength and melee combat, for my get-go character in a new Bethesda Fallout game? I was clearly asking for information technology—even though on some level I knew that Fallout 4 would eventually let me spec my character build into every specialization, and that lack of consequence (or indeed, authentic weakness) was one of the things that made me feel the sinking feeling in the kickoff place.

So aye, it was my bad. Plainly. Re-rolling my character and exploring new locations would gear up everything. Of this, I was certain.

Stage Iii: Fooling Yourself

Everything I did in stage two worked! I am now satisfied with my decision to sink upwards of 40 hours into this game and not play numerous other, smaller games or finally finished The Witcher three. Thank goodness.

I mean, sure, perchance Fallout 4's factions are kinda slow and there are no characters every bit interesting as Fallout 3's Tenpenny or Fallout: New Vegas' House or Caesar's Legion or really any of the tribes (let alone anyone from Fallout 2), and yeah, the interface is godawful, and OK, the main story ending could've been way better, and fine, it'south littered with the blanched bones of a far more interesting game, and alright, the dialogue system is needlessly vague and renders persuasion nearly useless, and aye, it's full of stressful junk, and off-white enough, at that place'south I gauge a chance I could get hit by a automobile while playing it.

The combat's way, way better, though. So much better. So information technology's all good. Everything is good. I am not wading into another random manufactory and bracing myself for yet some other last story that doesn't actually go anywhere, and I'chiliad certainly non emerging from a vault thinking, "Goddamn information technology, that was so close to beingness a heartbreaking story of human passion and scientific distance clashing like dysfunctional lovers, but it rushed to conclusion that wasn't really, well, conclusive." Go away, rising wellspring of negative feelings. Go!

Stage Four: Reluctant Acknowledgment

Shit, I'k pretty disappointed, aren't I? And notwithstanding, every spare second I accept, I keep booting this game up hoping to find some modest, almost intangible spark—something that'll reignite the torch I carried for then long.

Maybe I'll just... maybe I'll just go stay at my mom'southward for a weekend. Or a whole week. No, video game, this isn't the end. Calm down, calm down. I simply need to think for a bit, is all.

Phase Five: Credence OR Rejection

The final phase can get ane of two ways: either you lot take the game for what information technology is—despite the fact that it didn't live upwardly to what you wanted it to be—or you give up and lower your expectations associated with every future feeling of childlike excitement accordingly. Sometimes it comes down to exactly how much the game disappointed you. Other times, information technology's a matter of taking a long, difficult wait at what y'all're playing and asking yourself, "Am I having fun? Is this game, despite the broken heart it's given me, at to the lowest degree decent?"

The disappointment probably won't go abroad, but you tin can still accept a game (or annihilation else, for that affair) on its own terms. For what information technology'south worth, I'm finding Fallout 4 to be a fun post-apocalyptic activity romp—a series of intriguing combat encounters that I can arroyo with an increasingly Pentagon-esque arsenal of gadgets and tactics. I've taken to attempting to punch every enemy in the game off the top of some sort of building. I laugh every time information technology happens.

Simply permit'south say you find a disappointing game that you lot simply can't take, not fifty-fifty on its own terms. Enough of other games (not to mention movies, albums, events, and even people) disappointed me last year. It was, unfortunately, an unusually fertile year in disappointment's sordid soils. Seeking similar thrills from similar games and events and things ultimately yields diminishing returns. I think listening to new albums from bands that were once formative—fucking foundational—for me and thinking, "What happened?" I recall visiting longtime friends and family unit simply to notice that we'd grown apart, that reminiscing about erstwhile gags and escapades simply left me longing for new ones. That in mind, though, disappointment is an opportunity. Observe new stuff. Dearest information technology more than than you ever loved the thing that ultimately disappointed you. There are tons of weird, interesting games out there. Try them. Sleep less. Stop eating. Teach your dog to take intendance of itself, then you. Effort THEM ALL. Eventually, you'll discover a winner.

Bonus Stage: Pray For Mods To Brand Everything Astonishing

Modders are crazy. They've already added a million things (including longtime Skyrim BFFs Manlike Human Randy Savage and Thomas The Tank Engine) to Fallout 4, and they don't even take Bethesda'due south official cosmos kit however. In a year or two, it will probably be a totally different game. Is this hope I'1000 feeling, or is it self-mirage ? Information technology'due south tough to say. I've found that both bound eternal.